After a zillion more hours spent in airports for my Chicago trip (where, contrary to both expectations and experience, everything worked out as planned — heck, the flight home on Southwest arrived almost half an hour early!), it occurred to me that American airports need Japanese-style capsule hotels.

These should be past security, so you don’t need to fight your way through that line more than once. In the post-9/11 world, people are arriving at the airport many hours early, getting through security fast as possible, and then wait trapped in the newly-built malls that are now being built in the ‘secure’ areas at the airport. Adding a living dimension to those nascent communities gives the possibility for new life inside America’s ‘green zones.’

Airlines could use them for putting up passengers who missed their connecting flights and are stuck; it would be so much better than the current voucher system. People could check in absurdly early for their flights and get a good long nap, since they feature built-in alarm clocks, rent by the hour and are machine-sterilized between visitors. You’re lonely? Some hottie is lonely too? Take advantage of your delayed flight’s silver lining…